The many problems with 'Prometheus'

Ridley Scott has been enjoying something of a renaissance as of late, due in part to the breakout mainstream success of The Martian, but I am still shaking my head about his unsatisfying and somewhat stupefying non-prequel to Alien, Prometheus.

I revisited the movie recently, after recalling a somewhat disappointed reaction I had the first time I saw it in theaters, and wondering if it would improve upon second viewing -- it didn't.

It's not a terrible or unwatchable film, it looks phenomenal from a visual and technical point of view, but it's lacking in narrative purpose, which makes the news that a sequel is imminent all the more galling.

Prometheus promised to return to the complex universe Scott helped create in Alien.

It had a phenomenal trailer that suggested a thinking man's sci-fi thriller. While the film doesn't devolve into a generic chase film, it doesn't reach any highbrow heights either.

Even the part of the film which drew the most praise, Michael Fassbender's performance as a Lawrence of Arabia-inspired robot named David, is frustratingly flawed. After an intriguing beginning, the character's motives are maddeningly unclear, and I was never sure if he was a pawn or a villain. Speaking of the film's villain -- the closet thing to it is Guy Pearce, wearing pounds of crappy old-age make-up -- why not cast an actual old actor? That made zero sense.

Idris Elba and Charlize Theron try mightily, but for the most part none of the characters really stick with you and none come close to being as compelling as Sigourney Weaver's Ripley.

The whole movie amounts to a two-hour plus tease. There are plot holes galore and long slow stretches. But whenever the viewer nearly passes out, Scott sprinkles come visual homage to his superior 1979 film to make us think the inevitable link to that classic will present itself. It never does.

Prometheus

Or does it? The SPOILER ALERT end is a tremendously obnoxious fake out. The monsters -- which appeared to be a hairless, pale musclemen -- are dead. And a baby version of the original creature pops out of his chest and roars -- the end. Is this supposed to be just one very long trailer? And after Scott spend dozens of interviews denying that this film was a prequel, why did he put a scene like that in?

Suddenly everything that took place before feels even more pointless. It's kind of akin to watching Attack of the Clones after The Phantom Menace (I know, hating on the Star Wars prequels again!). Episode II proved that the events of The Phantom Menace were almost entirely inconsequential. Which only made audiences resent that movie more.

Prometheus actually provides an important lesson to the makers of the new Star Wars films. It actually got solid reviews and performed quite well at the box office, but it left a sour taste in a lot of viewers mouths because it barely delivered what people were paying for.

That kind of mistake can come back to haunt you, especially when films age over time.