'Under Siege' movies succeed in spite of Steven Seagal

Last night, for shits and giggles, my wife and I watched both Under Siege movies back-to-back, and I'm not going to lie, I had a great time. I find the appeal of these movies -- and really any Seagal movie -- fascinating, since the star has no charisma and little presence as a man of action.

Seagal's inflated ego and creepiness are the stuff of legend. For years he tried to pass himself off as the heir apparent to the likes of Bruce Lee even though he never appeared to be in very good shape and all of his 'fight scenes' were edited within an inch of their lives. In fact through two Under Siege movies I think I saw him fully throw a kick maybe twice?

In the second movie especially, he sort of lumbers around while everyone else in the movie hero worships him. His line deliveries are all in the same self satisfied whisper and he never has much of a human connection with anyone he's acting alongside.

Contrast this with the other A-list action stars of his heyday: Van-Damme was always an impressive physical specimen, Schwarzenegger was affably funny, Bruce Willis could be believably human and Stallone (my personal fave) could always elicit audience sympathy and usually played underdog status.

In the world of Under Siege, Seagal's character Casey Ryback -- super-soldier turned super-cook (a conceit the movies think is far funnier than it is) -- is a legend in his own time, a one man army who leaves both films with a single scratch on the cheek.

And putting all this aside, these movies (especially the first one) are quite fun in spite of him. The first film, which is easily his best and most successful, benefits enormously from two great bad guys -- Gary Busey and Tommy Lee Jones. They have great chemistry together as a naval officer and a ex military man turned mercenary who take over the ship Seagal's on for nefarious reasons.

Jones especially is a wildly entertaining firecracker in the movie. Watching this reminded me of what a wonderful actor he is and can be when he gets the right kind of material to chew on. Here, he's teamed with director Andrew Davis, who would team up with him again the following year to even great effect in The Fugitive.

Jones and Busey manage to raise Seagal's game a bit, and they are so formidable you are able to, for once, view Ryback as potentially outmatched. By the second film he's saddled with an irredeemably annoying Eric Bogosian (who was terrific in last year's Uncut Gems), so there threat just isn't there. But there is plenty of god awful special effects, dialogue and performances (a Katherine Heigel pops up as Seagal's niece) to keep you entertained.

All the hallmarks of the genre are here -- gratuitous nudity, excessive violence (who shoot someone five times when once will do?) and sheer stupidity. It's easy for me to watch movies like this with a lot of affection because this was the era of action films I came up with.

The stars didn't emote much, the movies were short and sweet (and usually meaningless). And right now, as we're all searching for joy and comfort, this really hit the spot for me.

'Gemini Man' and when an interesting premise is squandered

Will Smith's career is littered with missed opportunities. Bright was an infamous misfire with high production values. Hancock was like half a good, interesting movie before it went off the rails. He's excellent in I Am Legend until a disappointing last act diminishes the film.

I'm not weeping or worried for Will Smith, after all Bad Boys for Life is (to date) the biggest hit of the year, and it covd-19 continues to keep theaters closed it might remain at the top.

But, he can be a maddening movie star -- if for no other reason than his quality control radar seems to be seriously out of whack. A great example is last year's box office bomb Gemini Man. The film comes with an impressive pedigree -- it's directed by Ang Lee -- and on the surface appears to be an effects-driven thriller. But the finished product is a tonally wrong mess. In fact, it's shockingly inert considering what it could have become.

The film's major selling point was supposed to be its state of the art de-aging effects, which make it possible for Smith to play scenes opposite his younger self. In some ways, Smith seems like an ideal candidate for this kind of role. He still resembles his youthful self, and his career has stretched long enough that this could have been a meta opportunity for him to interrogate his star persona.

But instead, for some reason, Smith chooses to play both 'characters' as dour, largely humorless sad sacks -- strange, since his movie star appeal has always been his buoyancy and charm. There are plenty of actors who could effectively play scenes opposite themselves for high drama, but Smith just doesn't have the chops. So instead of being the tour de force he and Lee I imagine they want it to be, the movie winds up exposing Smith's limitations as an actor.

And as a pure action movie -- a few bravura scenes aside -- the movie falls short, too. Several major scenes are filmed in oppressive darkness, depriving them of the impact that they could have had. And the younger Smith character often looks like a rubbery cartoon in fight scenes -- although I do like the part where he tries to use a motorcycle as a weapon.

And the de-aging -- while mostly very impressive (especially in some of the close-ups) -- feels more like a gimmick. The Irishman proved that the technology could be deployed very effectively, as long as it's used to serve the story.

But the plot of Gemini Man is distressingly simplistic. Is there any character type more overplayed than the top notch assassin? I know what Lee and company are trying to do here -- make an earnest movie about someone who has lived a life they regret trying to prevent a younger version of himself from making the same mistakes -- interesting enough -- but Smith and the leaden script do nothing to fully establish what was so terrible about the life the elder Smith was leading.

Clearly, killing people for a living isn't a nice thing to do -- but Smith isn't convincing as someone who is conflicted about what they do. There's no danger about him as an actor -- at least not here -- he is a pretty unassailably 'good', so there's never really much moral conflict in him.

This preference for being 'likable' in a traditional sense is probably why he infamously turned down the role Django in Django Unchained. He reportedly wanted the romance in that movie beefed up, but I also suspect he needed to be more heroic in a mainstream sort of way.

To me, the best actors, not movie stars, don't have a lot of vanity and are willing to risk being flawed and a little unlikable. When Smith finds a role that really allows him to do that, I think he could be great. But Gemini Man was a step in the wrong direction.

Flashback 1990: My top 10 favorite movies from 30 years ago

Since the world is still spiraling out of control and there are literally no new movies to go see in theaters I thought I'd stick with my ongoing series of decade by decade favorite lists. I need to stress that it's favorite, not best of. These are the movies from any particular year I enjoy and revisit the most.

1990 was a solid year. It was the year Kevin Costner had his big triumph with Dances with Wolves, whereas GoodFellas -- a modest success at the time -- has easily endured as the year's most beloved, acclaimed film.

I want to make some honorable mentions: Awakenings, Jacob's Ladder, Q&A, Home Alone, Presumed Innocent, Edward Scissorhands -- just to name a few. But here are my top 10 faves from the year "U Can't Touch This" took the world by storm.

10. The Godfather Part III - This movie is a little unfairly derided because it pales in comparison to the original and Part II. Yes, the Sofia Coppola performance is subpar, but there is a lot to appreciate here. Al Pacino is excellent as an aging, sickly Michael Corleone, as is Andy Garcia as his hot-headed nephew. It's a gorgeously made epic that feels like an authentic Godfather movie is albeit a flawed one. Certainly not the disaster it's often made out to be.

9. King of New York - One of Christopher Walken's best (and creepiest) performances comes in this moody, violent gangster film directed by Abel Ferrara. His nearly all black crew is filled with a who's who of black characters actors (it's as if the cast of Spike Lee's School Daze moved straight from that production to this one). It's no surprise that this film has had a lot of influence on hip-hop it's cool as ice and oozing a specific brand of nihilistic cool.

8. The Hunt for Red October - The first and still the best Jack Ryan movie is an exciting, smart submarine thriller featuring a charismatic Sean Connery (improbably good as a Russian naval captain) and a fresh faced (and thin) Alec Baldwin as a CIA analyst turned action here. I can't speak to the movie's specific politics, but it's very well paced and holds up quite well. Part of director John McTiernan's brief but impressive peak, which also includes Predator and Die Hard.

7. Miller's Crossing - One of the most overlooked, great Coen brothers movies. Funny on the margins, but mostly a stone cold period gangster film. Beautifully photographed and staged with note perfect performances from actors like Gabriel Byrne, Albert Finney and especially John Turturro, whose sniveling, shifty performance is of one the best in the filmmaking duo's entire canon, If you can get on this movie's unusual wavelength, you won't be disappointed.

6. Dick Tracy - A fun candy colored cartoon (that's live action) which was a favorite of mine as a child. Warren Beatty headlines and directs an all-star cast that's mostly unrecognizable under heavy makeup plus a vamping Madonna as the femme fatale in this adaptation of the iconic comic strip. Disarmingly sweet and light hearted with Al Pacino having a ball as the villain in perhaps his funniest performance ever.

5. Wild at Heart - David Lynch's disturbing, violent and sexy road movie is one of his best. To call it 'heightened' would be an understatement, but there are images in this movie (like Diane Ladd's face covered in red lipstick) that I will never forget. Nicolas Cage and Laura Dern are incredible as a pair of young lovers on the run. And Willem Dafoe has ever been more unsettling than he is here as the venal Bobby Peru. Strange to be sure, but also sensational.

4. Misery - Proof that Rob Reiner was once an exceptional director, this Stephen King adaptation is truly scary and riveting from start to finish. He's aided tremendously by two incredible performances from Kathy Bates (who won the Oscar for her performance as deranged superfan Annie Wilkes) and James Caan who conveys a myriad of emotions even though he spends most of the movie strapped own to a bed. This is one of those movies that I can be up for watching anytime, anywhere.

3. Total Recall - Arnold Schwarzenegger's best non-Terminator role and quite possibly his best performance is in this inventive Philip K. Dick adaptation about a superspy with amnesia and an affinity for Mars. Despite its elaborate plot, its infinitely watchable, visually striking and hilarious thanks for director Paul Verhoeven's unconventional approach. It's simply a really fun movie that only seems to get better with age.

2. GoodFellas - For many, understandably, this film is viewed as the definitive gangster epic (which is why Scorsese may have made The Irishman as a counter point to this film's popularity). An immersive look at the world of the lower level guys angling to be 'made' -- Ray Liotta is excellent as the audience surrogate, DeNiro has remarkable presence as his mentor and Oscar winner Joe Pesci is sublime as a volatile and doomed gangster. So vivid and precise -- this is Scorsese using all his talents here to the best of his ability and the result is one of the most rewatchable masterpieces ever made.

1. The Grifters - GoodFellas may be the technically better film and this was close for me, but The Grifters has always been my personal favorite of this year. It's got it's one sexy and mysterious sparkle -- although it's set in the present it feels slightly out of time (like some Tarantino films). At its core its a three hander with Anjelica Huston, John Cusack and Annette Bening all bringing fireworks as a trio of hustlers whose lives collide in shocking ways. Funny, fierce and incredibly well acted. In fact Huston's performance here may be my favorite female performance of all time. Whew, that ending!

PAST TOP 10 FAVORITE LISTS
1974 #1 movie - The Godfather Part II
1975 #1 movie - Nashville
1976 #1 movie - Taxi Driver
1977 #1 movie - Star Wars
1978 #1 movie - The Deer Hunter
1979 #1 movie - The Jerk
1984 #1 movie - Ghostbusters
1985 #1 movie - Fletch
1986 #1 movie - Blue Velvet
1987 #1 movie - The Untouchables
1988 #1 movie - Coming to America
1989 #1 movie - Batman
1994 #1 movie - Pulp Fiction
1995 #1 movie - Heat
1996 #1 movie - Fargo
1997 #1 movie - Boogie Nights
1998 #1 movie - The Big Lebowski
1999 #1 movie - Eyes Wide Shut
2000 #1 movie - Nurse Betty
2004 #1 movie - Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
2005 #1 movie - A History of Violence
2006 #1 movie - Casino Royale
2007 #1 movie - There Will Be Blood
2008 #1 movie - The Wrestler
2009 #1 movie - Inglourious Basterds
2010 #1 movie - The Social Network

'Caddyshack' might just be my favorite comedy of all time

Caddyshack has always been a source of unmitigated joy for me. It's not a perfect movie -- the caddy characters' subplot focused on Michael O'Keefe and his sweetheart with a horrendous attempt at Irish has always been just so-so and it's more for a series of vignettes rather than actual movie.

But, the peak comedy stylings of Chevy Chase, Rodney Dangerfield, Ted Knight and Bill Murray are so delightful and hilarious that they more than make up for the movie's shortcomings.

The tragedy behind the scenes of this movie is that one of the genius creators behind it -- the legendary Doug Kenney -- died thinking the movie was a failure. It's true that the early reviews were hostile --I suspect moreso because the comedy was specifically aimed at the very generation of snooty older folks that comprised the critic community at the time.

But the movie clearly worked for the audience it was intended for --young men -- and it was a solid hit if not a blockbuster. Over the years it has endured to become one of the most beloved, quotable movies of all time. And while it may not be a touchstone for kids who grew up in the Judd Apatow era (whose improvisational films were clearly inspired by this one), but it'll always be one of my favorite movies.

I have always loved its larger than life characters  -- the suave iconoclastic Ty Webb (Chase), the coarse and colorful Al Czverik (Dangerfield), the obnoxious upper cruster Judge Smails (Knight) and the deranged groundskeeper Carl (Murray). And I have always been obsessed with its theme of slobs vs. snobs.

The film came out in 1980, the year Ronald Reagan would be elected president and usher in an age of conservatism where someone like the Smails character would actually be revered and romanticized.

Caddyshack is a rude, crude thumb in the eye of that form of the establishment and I'll always be here for it.

I've especially always be drawn to Chase's character. He is, not unlike the actor himself, to the manner born but he deliberately rebukes his richy rich background. He quotes Zen philosophy, he doesn't keep score when he plays golf and he puts down Smails deftly every chance he gets.

Chase, who is regularly and perhaps fairly pilloried for his bad behavior on set and bad career choices, shows so much of the unconventional leading man charisma and potential he had here that was unfortunately squandered by the end of the decade. But I will always value Caddyshack for at least crystalizing what made him such a unique talent.

The same goes for Dangerfield, who while not an actor, is simply a scene stealing star in this movie. He is wild eyed dervish shooting off one liners with abandon and invigorated by a back-slapping, party guy spirit that is infectious as hell. His final line in this movie -- the totally anachronistic "we're all gonna get laid" is one of my favorite 'what the hell' moments in movie history.

Ted Knight, who I have come to learn had begun a long battle with cancer at the start of filming this movie, is its lowkey MVP. He is so committed to being the comic foil for all the crazy characters who populate the fictional Bushwood country club that he ends up frequently being the funniest character himself. The best comedy is always played straight and Knight was a pro at that.

Finally, there's Bill Murray who was just at the beginning of his ascent. He would follow this movie with Stripes, Tootsie and Ghostbusters, a hot streak any actor would envy. His part here is almost entirely improvised and perfunctory but that doesn't make it any less inspired. He brings the same unpredictable, sly style here that made so many of this later performances so electric and he's sadly the only one left who has still got it. Chase is still alive, but ya know, barely.

During this terrible time, it's so important to grab onto the things that bring us joy -- and the people too, if possible. And for me Caddyshack is movie comfort food. It goes down easy. It always makes me laugh. And it meant something to me. Growing up, these were comedy Gods and for better or worse, I still worship them.

While You Were Streaming: Quarantine recommendations for you

We're all relying on streaming services now more than ever because of the coronavirus quarantine and luckily there is a lot of amazing stuff out there to choose from. Amazon Prime has the best selection of free content -- if you ask me -- but of course Netflix has a lot of terrific stuff too, including their fantastic originals like The Irishman and Dolemite Is My Name.

My wife and I have been watching fun 'bad' movies with friends simultaneously over Google Hangout and it's been a blast. And a lot of people, especially my parents have been looking for recommendations so I thought I'd do a regular rolling list for folks, especially since the quarantine won't be ending anytime soon.

AMAZON PRIME

The Conversation - One of Francis Ford Coppola's greatest films is criminally under-seen despite being a Best Picture nominee and featuring one of Gene Hackman's most indelible performances as a surveillance expert who gets too involved in one of his own cases. A moody and miraculous masterpiece.

Mission: Impossible Fallout - One of the greatest action movies of the last ten years and quite possibly the best entry in Tom Cruise's remarkably durable spy series. It manages to feel fresh and add some more emotional gravitas while delivering the death defying real life stunts that will make your jaw drop.

The Farewell - The fact that this moving and sweet family dramedy  went totally ignored at last year's Oscars was a travesty. Awkwafina is incredible in a relatable lead performance and the veteran actress Zhao Shu-zhen steals the movie as Nai Nai, the matriarch of a sprawling family trying to conceal a debilitating illness from her.

The Descent - One of the great horror movies. It starts off as an amiable travelogue about a group of women going spelunking and then it takes an amazing turn. It's definitely not for the faint hearted but if you're looking for some terrific jump scares and a thrilling pace, this one will get the job done.

Midsommar - Now, if you're looking for more cerebral scares you can't go wrong with director Ari Aster's surreal sophomore effort starring 2019's breakout actress Florence Pugh in a role that should have garnered Oscar consideration, too. A gorgeous movie with some truly grisly, unforgettable moments. Again, not for everyone's tastes, but if you can appreciate very dark, disturbing stuff, this one is a can't miss.

Reds - Warren Beatty's epically long drama about an American socialist is incredibly prescient right now, given the debate on the left about the future of democratic politics here in America. It's a history lesson but also a love story -- with Diane Keaton giving a great performance as Beatty's love interest. It's a behemoth but never really boring. Good for a rainy day.

Moonstruck - Cher and Nicolas Cage have never been more charming (and they have real chemistry) in this hit romantic comedy. It's an incredibly simple, straightforward movie but that it a big part of its appeal. And watching Cher's character transform from a shy, grey-haired shopkeeper to well, Cher, is magical. Snap out of it and see this movie.

Over the Top or Road House - If you're looking for very fun bad movies to watch with your friends and have a ball you really can't go wrong with either of these options. They're so entertaining, so ludicrous and so wonderfully 'of their time.' I can't sing their praises enough.

NETFLIX

GoodFellas - What is there to say about this Martin Scorsese masterpiece that hasn't already been said? It's ferociously funny, tense and tragic. It's one of the best gangster films ever made and it will always be. If you haven't seen it you've missed out one of the most enduring, influential movies ever.

Good Time - If you liked Uncut Gems you're gonna love the Safdie brothers' breakout film, which made me a true believer in the talents of actor Robert Pattinson and a huge fan of the filmmakers' brand of overwhelming mayhem mixed with gallows humor.

Drive - This moody homage to films like Thief and The Driver, is an incredible piece of pulp -- beautifully shot and acted (how did Albert Brooks not get a nomination for his against type villainous role?). Director Nicolas Winding Refn has yet to top this movie but will always get street cred for it. It's sort of the anti-Fast and Furious, but if you're looking for something unexpected, you'll appreciate it.

Candyman - While we wait for the Jordan Peele-produced remake, it might be worth revisiting the classic 1992 original. It's not just a horror movie -- there's a lot of interesting things this movie has to say about race, class and gentrification. It's ahead of its time in that it's a socially relevant horror film. It's also scary as hell, too.

Blade Runner - A sci-fi masterpiece with a still visionary look at a possible future. Incredibly bleak and cold -- it's not a movie for everyone -- but if you appreciate thought-provoking meditations on the nature of humanity (and flying cars) there's a lot to appreciate here. Harrison Ford is reliably great, but the show stopper here is Rutger Hauer as the charismatic bad guy (or is he?) Roy Batty.

Purple Rain - Any Prince fan and completist needs to see this autobiographical musical. There are elements which are undeniably problematic, but there is no denying how incredible and sexy all the musical performances are. If you're trying to figure out what made Prince such a special, once-in-a-lifetime talent it's all here. Also, Morris Day is just delightful.

Groundhog Day - A great melding of the sensibilities of the later writer-director Harold Ramis and his comedic brother from another mother Bill Murray. A great zen premise (man waking up in the same day until he learns to love selflessly) is milked for all the laughs and pathos you can muster. Besides a horrible opening number, this is a perfect movie.

There Will Be Blood - I think it's Paul Thomas Anderson's best film (in a filmography that so far has no duds in it). I think it's my favorite Daniel Day-Lewis performance (and I've never seen a bad one of those either. An incredible take on American capitalism and how it can destroy your soul. In other words, just a fun time at the movies.

Don't call it a comeback ... actually I want these actors to 'come back'

The whole idea of Hollywood 'comebacks' is kind of silly. Actors usually don't fully go away unless they are people who prematurely retire like Cameron Diaz and Gene Hackman (two actors I would love to see acting again). It's usually better suited for people who have either not had a strong role in years or who have faded a bit thanks to poor choices or diminished exposure. It's satisfying as movie fans to see someone who was once great be great again -- Eddie Murphy's role in Dolemite Is My Name is a great example. Sometimes it doesn't even need to be in a 'hit' per se. Nicolas Cage was excellent in Mandy and Color Out of Space, few people saw them but he's no longer just a punchline anymore.

To me 'comeback' is as much about a return to greatness than anything else. For instance, Mark Wahlberg has been consistently working for years now, but I haven't enjoyed any of his work since probably The Departed (for which he was Oscar nominated) and he may have peaked in his late 90s role in Boogie Nights and Three Kings.

There have been a lot of remarkable returns -- Stallone in the Creed movies -- hell not just Joe Pesci, but I'd argue both Pacino and De Niro in The Irishman. With a lot of time on my hands and a lot of movies to watch, here are 10 people I wish were lighting up the big screen more:

Kathleen Turner - She was one of the most popular leading ladies of the 1980s -- a sexy, husky-voiced scene stealer in classics like Body Heat, Romancing the Stone and The War of the Roses. The stuff that derailed her career is legendary -- health issues, flops, clashes with co-stars -- but I have no doubt she is a still a terrific actress even if she is many years removed from her old image. She's certainly been active on the stage but I can't remember the last time I saw her in a movie.

Judge Reinhold - One of the most lovable actors of the 80s -- he gave some truly fantastic performances in classics like Fast Times at Ridgemont High, Ruthless People and Beverly Hills Cop. His usual look and delivery (he always sounds like he is on NyQuil) made him a distinct character and I think he'd be great in a comedic role or even in an against type dramatic one. Particularly in Fast Times, he showed an ability to play drama that's gone underutilized.

Val Kilmer - Kilmer's career is a horror show of missed opportunities. He had a brief return in 2005's Kiss Kiss Bang Bang but then he got lost in the direct-to-DVD abyss. In recent years, illness has ravaged his appearance and prevented him from acting at all. It may be impossible for Kilmer to return to his leading man heights of the 1990s, but I can't help but think, if he can get his personal life together, that he still has a great performance or two in him.

Ben Stiller - He's quietly not made a movie in three years. He's clearly aged out of the silly Frat Pack movies that made him a superstar. I've always thought he was an interesting performer and a very strong director (The Cable Guy, Tropic Thunder). He stumbled a bit with his Walter Mitty movie, but he has been curiously quiet. Although his work on the series Escape from Dannemora is stellar and suggests future greatness.

Benicio Del Toro - Speaking of that series, it was a huge reminder of what a special talent Del Toro is. He's kept busy in showy supporting roles over the years, but he hasn't had a great big screen role for him to sink his teeth into for years. I still think of is powerful Oscar winning performance in Traffic as one of the great tour de forces of the early 2000s. Why he hasn't consistently worked at that level (with the possible exception of the Sicario movies) I don't know.

Uma Thurman - It's a shame that aside from a small, but pivotal role in Lars Von Trier's controversial The House That Jack Built, I haven't seen much of Thurman since her Kill Bill heyday. I understand that those incredibly physical roles took their toll on her (she has alleged that director Quentin Tarantino frequently crossed the line with her during the making of those hit movies). I miss seeing her in the movies and think she'd bring a newfound gravitas to any role she gets.

Will Ferrell - This may sound like a weird one, Ferrell still works all the time, and frequently headlines hits, but I can't help but feel like he has been off the rails for a few years now. I used to be psyched to see anything Ferrell made, but I haven't felt that way since probably Anchorman 2. The Daddy's Home franchise doesn't appeal to me for a myriad of reasons. I thought his latest film -- Downfall with Julia Louis-Dreyfus, might have had some potential but the reviews suggest otherwise. Basically he needs his own Uncut Gems.

Kevin Kline - It's weird how Kevin Kline used to be a movie star who had his own vehicles (Dave, In & Out) and now he is a non entity in the movies. He is in his early 70s now, so he has every reason to slow down, but he was such a unique actor -- equally adept at comedy and drama -- it feels like he could and should be giving dynamic character turns in something.

Pierce Brosnan - I don't think I'm the only person who thought Brosnan was the best thing about his James Bond movies. And he has shown great wit and style in outside projects like The Ghost Writer and The Thomas Crown Affair. Now that he is older and grayer, I think he can bring a kind of weathered virility to roles, especially now that he is no longer shackled by 007.

Delroy Lindo - Lindo was a ubiquitous character actor in the 90s -- Crooklyn, Malcolm X, Get Shorty, Ransom, etc. etc. And then suddenly he seemed to disappear. Like all the other folks on this list, he's been actively working but just in a low profile sort of way, that's why I'm excited to hear that he'll be in Spike Lee's upcoming war drama Da 5 Bloods.

Lost, rumored movie projects that I am obsessed with

All of this talk about big tentpole movies getting delayed indefinitely has gotten me thinking about projects I've heard about over the years and was excited about, but have never been made and probably never will be. They're movies that you hear about from filmmakers or trade publications as stuff that's 'in development' but for one reason or another they don't happen.

It'll be curious to see what happens with the release schedule once delayed movies finally start coming out.

Production has been shut down on several major movies -- perhaps all of them -- so there is going to be a bit of a drought at some point as the industry tries to catch up and that's if we can wrangle COVD-19 in this country, and right now it's a big if.

So with this time on my hands I'm going to talk about some projects that I remember hearing about and wish were still possible...

Uptown Saturday Night remake - I remember once hearing that director Adam McKay was looking to reboot this Sidney Poitier-Bill Cosby comedy about two regular guys who stumble into mobster antics with Will Smith and Denzel Washington in a rare comedic role. I was so excited to see Denzel especially outside of his comfort zone. I believe he can be very funny with the right material and McKay would have been the perfect director to coax humor out of him.

Yankee wife swap picture - Years ago I'd heard that Ben Affleck and Matt Damon were attached to a  biopic about the incredible true story of two New York Yankees pitchers who decided to swap wives and families in the 1970s. They have probably aged out of of these roles by now but I still think it's an incredible story that is worth telling -- maybe get Chris Pine and Chris Pratt to play the teammates?

Bill Murray baseball movies - At various times the mercurial Murray has been attached to a biopic of legendary and colorful baseball promoter Bill Veeck and more recently he's been floated as a potential casting coup as former Cubs manager Joe Madden in a film about their historic World Series season. Like so many Bill Murray stories, it's hard to know how much is true and how much is hyperbole

Martin Scorsese's Dean Martin movie - For years, I've heard that Martin Scorsese was looking to make a biopic about the iconic Rat Packer. I'm intrigued since Scorsese has only really dipped a toe in the genre once, with The Aviator (I guess you could count The Last Temptation of Christ).

For some time, Tom Hanks was the name most often associated with this project, and the idea of a collaboration between him and Scorsese sounds fantastic but the ship has probably sailed on this one.

Dan Aykroyd's Chevy Chase comeback vehicle - Aykroyd has unfortunately become better known as an eccentric vodka pitchman  than for his acting over the last few years but he did raise some eyebrows when he claimed to be writing a film for him and Chevy Chase to star in -- a kind of Spies Like Us reunion. Presumably the film would factor in their ages (Chase is now in his late 70s) and would be a throwback of sorts to their brand of SNL humor. I love these guys and would love to see them in a least one last truly funny movie, but it's hard to tell if either of them have the chops for it.

The Last Dragon remake - The original Last Dragon is a great bad movie, a total cult classic that has a lot of affection for it, especially in the black community. Years ago there was talk of remaking it with Rihanna in the love interest role played by Vanity and Samuel L. Jackson as the villain Sho Nuff. I still think this could be a fun, viable project as long as the filmmakers get the tone right.

Spike Lee-Eddie Murphy collaboration - A while ago I'd heard that Lee and Murphy were going to team up for an HBO film about the wild life of former DC Mayor Marion Barry. It seemed like an irresistible pairing and subject matter. I know Murphy and Lee had not been particularly friendly in the past so I was excited to see that they had buried the hatchet and decided to combine forces. Plus, I've always loved Murphy in his more dramatic roles. I hope this can still happen!

Spike Lee's Joe Louis movie - Speaking of Spike Lee, he also had a biopic of the legendary boxer Joe Louis floating around. He supposedly penned a film about Louis' iconic bouts against German Max Schmeing with the veteran (now later) screenwriter Bud Schulberg. Casting might be a challenge (Louis had a very distinct look) but this feels like an easy, patriotic home run of a movie, if not for Lee, than for someone.

Richard Pryor biopic - Basically every black comic actor of a certain age has been linked to a theoretical Pryor movie (Marlon Wayans is said to have made an incredible audition tape). For whatever reason -- I suspect tensions within the Pryor estate -- there has yet to be a big screen (or even documentary) dedicated to the remarkable rise and tragic end of perhaps the greatest of stand up comic who ever lived. It feel like an enormous missed opportunity.

Escape from New York remake - To be clear, I don't want this remake to happen. The original Escape from New York is one of my favorite movies and unless there was a top notch director involved with a new vision, I feel like this can only be a letdown (although the production values would be better). But if they do make it -- I hope they do it well. Years ago there was a rumor that Gerard Butler was being tapped for the Kurt Russell role -- terrible choice.

Old man Batman movie - There is a pretty legendary string of graphic novels depicting Batman as an old man struggling to keep up his work as the Caped Crusader as Gotham descends into madness. Decades ago there was talk of someone like Clint Eastwood suiting up to play this part. I would argue that the original and still the best big screen Batman -- Michael Keaton -- is the perfect age right now to reprise the role. He hasn't outright said he wouldn't return and it'd be cool to see the Tim Burton aesthetic merged with the more modern Christopher Nolan one. This will probably not happen for some time (the Ben Affleck gray-haired Batman was certainly a nod to it) especially with the younger version of the character heading to the big screen soonish but I boy can dream can't he?